Bay Area cemeteries offer beauty in mourning

And while San Francisco famously banned burials in the city in the early 20th century, its remaining cemeteries include the Presidio, the Columbarium in the Richmond District and Mission Dolores. A recent book, “San Francisco’s Forgotten Cemeteries” by Beth Winegarner, tells the story of the gravesites that are much closer to us than many of us realize. Marin, Oakland and the aforementioned Colma also have their own notable sites filled with gorgeous monuments, rolling landscapes and markers of history.

Cemeteries such as Pere Lachaise in Paris, Hollywood Forever in Los Angeles and Lafayette Cemetery No. 1 in New Orleans have even become major tourist attractions for both locals and visitors alike to pay their respects to notable residents and soak in the history on display. While some might find the proximity to the dead in these places to be unnerving, others find comfort in the way cemeteries and memorial sites connect us to past generations, and help us through our processes of mourning. Some people find beauty in the landscapes and monuments that commemorate those gone.

Left: Grave markers at Golden Hill Park and Memorial Home are seen from Hillside Boulevard in Colma. Right: A monument is seen at the Italian Cemetery from F Street in Colma. (Photos by Lea Suzuki/The Chronicle)
Top: Grave markers at Golden Hill Park and Memorial Home are seen from Hillside Boulevard in Colma. Above: A monument is seen at the Italian Cemetery from F Street in Colma. (Photos by Lea Suzuki/The Chronicle)

“There’s such an avoidance of grief in our culture; the focus is on buying the shiny new object or looking at advertisements of beautiful young people,” said Amy Hyun Swart, a San Francisco grief therapist. “When we look at places like cemeteries, we see that this is a place where quietness and reflection are a little more accepted. Historically, cemeteries have been there for families to gather, for people to grieve as a community.”

Many of the Bay Area’s cemeteries also bear deeply personal emblems of those passed. Sometimes it’s a tender message inscribed on a tombstone, other times it’s a memorial monument that takes the form of something the deceased loved during their lifetime, or meaningful objects left in lieu of flowers. Hyun Swart said that these tributes can help the living feel connected to the dead and “allow us to see an anthropological snippet of people’s lives from so long ago.”

Perhaps the art and beauty of these places is also meant to help put us more at ease with that final outcome in store for us all. As Percy Bysshe Shelley wrote in his poem “Adonais,” “The cemetery is an open space among the ruins, covered in winter with violets and daisies. “It might make one in love with death, to think that one should be buried in so sweet a place.”

Mission Dolores

(Mission San Francisco de Asís) 3321 16th St., SF

The oldest structure in San Francisco, the church at the Mission dates to 1791. The Mission site was founded in 1776 by Padre Francisco Palóu. The cemetery not only contains graves and tributes to the missionaries who colonized the area, but also a statue commemorating the many indigenous Ohlone people who died on the site.

Left: Gravestones at Mission Dolores Cemetery in San Francisco. Right: A gravestone at the foot of a tree at the historic Mission Dolores Cemetery in San Francisco. (Photos by Stephen Lam/The Chronicle)
Top: Gravestones at Mission Dolores Cemetery in San Francisco. Above: A gravestone at the foot of a tree at the historic Mission Dolores Cemetery in San Francisco. (Photos by Stephen Lam/The Chronicle)

The churchyard was famously seen in Alfred Hitchcock’s 1958 suspense classic “Vertigo” as the burial place of Madeleine Elster’s ancestress Carlotta Valdez.

Presidio Pet Cemetery

667 McDowell Ave., SF

This small cemetery was founded in 1952 as a final resting place for the pets of military families who lived at the Presidio. The markers range from simple wood to more elaborate stone, many bearing names like Butch, Button and Wiggles. While primarily home to cats and dogs, there’s at least one rabbit, “Rye,” whose grave bears the inscription “Have sweet dreams about carrots.”

Left: A sign at the Presidio Pet Cemetery, which holds the remains of beloved pets whose owners resided in the Presidio. Right: A painting is nestled in the grass at the Presidio Pet Cemetery. (Photos by Stephen Lam/The Chronicle)
Top: A sign at the Presidio Pet Cemetery, which holds the remains of beloved pets whose owners resided in the Presidio. Above: A painting is nestled in the grass at the Presidio Pet Cemetery. (Photos by Stephen Lam/The Chronicle)

The site is a powerful reminder of the deep love and comfort humans find in the animals we share our lives with.

San Francisco Columbarium & Funeral Home

1 Lorraine Court, SF

Established in 1898, the Columbarium was once part of the Odd Fellows Cemetery that occupied about 30 acres in the Richmond District. The handsome columbarium and chapel with their Baroque and Neoclassical influences are the last remaining structures from the original cemetery. (Bodies were moved to the Green Lawn Cemetery in Colma beginning in 1929.)

Clockwise from left: A statue at the San Francisco Columbarium. A photograph of the late Marian and Vivian Brown. The final resting place for Harvey Milk. (Photos by Stephen Lam/The Chronicle)
From top: A statue at the San Francisco Columbarium. A photograph of the late Marian and Vivian Brown. The final resting place for Harvey Milk. (Photos by Stephen Lam/The Chronicle)

Among the notable San Franciscans paid tribute are Supervisor Harvey Milk and twin sisters Marian and Vivian Brown, known in the city as the beloved Brown Twins. Monuments in the shape of Coit Tower, the Golden Gate Bridge and cable cars remind visitors of the importance the city plays in many people’s lives, and that love of the city for some doesn’t end in death.

Reach Tony Bravo: tbravo@sfchronicle.com